Front And Center

I would love, love, LOVE to be a stay at home mom but the fact that both my husband and I attended a private college coupled with some bad financial decisions we made early in our marriage make it impossible. We are however, very fortunate to have jobs that compliment each other in a way that allows for one of us to be home with our son every single day except Tuesday and Thursday mornings. On those days I leave him in the church's Mother's Day Out program while I work upstairs. Given our situation, we are so blessed that I have a boss who is supportive and understanding and that Travis has a job that affords a lot of time at home.

Having said all of that.you should know that because I am not able to stay at home with him 24/7 I am fiercely protective of the time that I do have with him and will do anything in my power to keep him with me when I am not working. As a result, I do not take him to the nursery Bible class; I do not drop him off at daycare during our HomeTEAM; I don't put him in the nursery during church, and if I have to leave him with someone so my husband and I can go on a date it will usually be my mother. My decisions as a mother have broached many sarcastic comments and a few critical observations but at this stage in my son's life I feel the most important thing I can provide for him (other than food, shelter and a dry bottom) is consistency.

My family sits front and center on the second row of a church auditorium that spans a 270 degree fan. To say that it is difficult to keep a 9 month old baby still and quiet for 90 minutes in a spot that has the potential to be seen by almost every congregation member in the church would be an understatement. So far, we've not had any major problems and I will continue to keep my son with the family until the point that it becomes necessary to move to the back of the church or to a training room. This decision has also met with a lot of criticism (and not a few dirty looks) but I stand firm just the same. I choose to stay there not because of righteous indignation but because the spot allows for growing opportunities. When the Senior Minister speaks, my son pays attention because after all he is standing right in front of us with no one in between us to draw his attention away. When the worship minister sings, my son watches him and shrieks back in his own sing-songy way. But more importantly, any direction he turns he has the vantage point to see the face of every member of our church worshiping, praying, and praising God. I choose to take the risk because I think the risk is worthy of the blessings in my son's life.

Just a few Sundays ago, a man whom I have never met, walked up to me, introduced himself, and then pointed out where he sits in church just behind us. His eyes welled with tears as he said, "Thank you for sitting in the front with your son and your sweet family. I love watching the three of you worship and find so much blessing in witnessing a family worship and grow together." To be honest, I was really surprised because I was sure that probably most people in our section were annoyed by the squirmy little boy, but I was so grateful that he had the sense to share with me something that I needed to hear so desperately. It immediately made me think of a couple I used to watch in church who would hold hands the entire time they were worshiping while each of their outside hands were raised in praise to God. As a child I remember thinking they looked like a strange bird but now that I am older I fully appreciate the beauty of worshiping in unity not just as a body but as families. There are so many opportunities in our life for familial segregation, so many that I can't even begin to name them all. I know there is a time and place for age-appropriate spiritual development but for now I will treasure every moment spent worshiping as a family and will seek to find other ways to unite in worship.

Do not exasperate your children;
instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
Ephesians 6:4

Your thoughts?