Tuesday, August 29, 2006

I Wanna Be Just Like You



"I thought about the whole notion of "reproduction," and what it really means to replicate yourself. Is it merely about the passing on of eyes and chins and hair color? Or is it, rather, the replication of the heart? Do we leave a bigger mark by passing on our genes, or our thoughts?"
~ Shannon Woodward, author of
Inconceivable: Finding Peace
in the Midst of Infertility ~

When I first found out I was pregnant I wasn't really sure how I felt. On the one hand, I was really excited that the love between my husband and me could produce something tangible and I was really excited about the prospect of being a mom. On the other hand, I was really scared about being held accountable for the life of a tiny little person.

The first few weeks after the birth of my son were spent in the hospital. I was rarely allowed to "be mom" because the nurses were charged with his full-time care. As a result I began to feel under-qualified and wondered if I could cut it as a mom. As most mothers can tell you, it only took about a week of caring for my son on my own before I became the resident expert on all things "Little Man". As we watched him grow and began to discover the tiny facets of his personality we noticed the intricate way with which our genes had combined to form this unique individual. Aside from the obvious inheritances he received from each of us: face shape, eye color, nose, hair color, etc. there are less obvious things like the way he sticks out his bottom lip when he is unhappy, or arches his eyebrow when he is confused, or the difficulty he has getting a full night's sleep or the blank stare he gets just minutes after waking up. But even though there are things we naturally pass on to him that can't be helped, I've recently become more aware of the things that he inherits from us that can be helped and should be shaped: personality traits, spirituality, beliefs, political views, education, language, etc. I've given lots of thought about the way in which I am raising him and the charge of raising a man of God. I've thought about the kind of people I want in his life as examples and the kinds of experiences I want him to have. I've thought out life scenarios and the subsequent conversations I would have with him. I've thought about the language with which I speak, not referring to whether or not I use vulgar language but the way in which my language is peppered with the love of Christ or words about my loving God.

I am suddenly aware that the legacy of being a parent is less about genes and reproduction and more about heart and the replication of Christ. May I be the kind of parent who lives Christ in her every day life so that my son will inherit more from me than my nose and my curly hair.

Lord, I want to be just like You
'Cause he wants to be just like me
I want to be a holy example
For his innocent eyes to see
Help me be a living Bible, Lord
That my little boy can read
I want to be just like You
'Cause he wants to be like me

by Phillips, Craig and Dean

Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates, so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land that the LORD swore to give your forefathers, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.
Deuteronomy 11:18-21

Your thoughts?

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